Agnostic to I Am
I began my spiritual life as a Methodist. That meant Fellowship Hall dinners, church on Sunday, and be ashamed if you don’t have any idea what is being talked about and don’t care because you are so BORED. As soon as it wasn’t required of me to go to church, I quit going.
In high school, I entertained beliefs that aliens may have created religion. It made as much sense as anything. What I didn’t realize was that I was consistently drawn to God and the Nature of God by my very resistance of it. As an adult, I felt that I was an Agnostic. I wanted more evidence to Believe. The one thing that I did instinctively know was that there had to be more than one way to find out what everything was about.
When I was working at the spiritual book and audio publisher, Sounds True, we had the good fortune of having authors give presentations to the whole company on occasion. I had heard several authors that were mildly interesting but no one who was providing the path to the path. One day, we had Dr. Steven Gurgevich give us a guided meditation. He guided us on a visual journey of ancient Greece to see one of the early doctors. I don’t remember the detail of the journey but the thing I did notice was astounding. I realized that while Dr. Gurgevich was speaking, I was gone. I was so absorbed in the story he was telling that I lost the concept of where I was and what I was doing. I also had no concept of time in the sense that the session could have been ten minutes long or three hours. I had no way to tell. It turned out to be around 20 – 25 minutes. Dr. Gurgevich explained that we had achieved a hypnogogic or trance state. I had never felt this absorbed before other than an occasional daydream (which are hypnogogic states themselves). This was important to me because my friend Anthony had been urging me to try a series of brainwave CDs that also achieved this trance state. I had resisted before but now that I knew what it was like to be in an altered state of consciousness (and that it was safe) I was eager to try them. This initial experience made me wonder what else is out there. Read More