Pre-Silent Retreat Experience

When I decided to book my first silent retreat back in 2021, I remember feeling nervous about the whole experience. But really, who wouldn’t be? Even though I had participated in other spiritual retreats, temazcal ceremonies, and even a Native American vision quest, I still found myself hesitant about the "silence factor."

I’ve always enjoyed silence—it doesn’t scare me. I’m comfortable with long pauses in conversation or spending hours alone in quiet. However, the thought of spending five full days in complete silence brought a mix of excitement and nervousness: Can I stay silent for that long? How will I process strong emotions in silence? What if I want to leave halfway through the retreat?

On top of that, I was experiencing a relapse of symptoms from an old back injury, and my body wasn’t sure about saying yes to this experience right away. Thankfully, my welcome call with Shanan (the Silent Retreat coordinator) reassured me and allowed me to feel a full and confident "yes" to my first silent retreat.

The Retreat Experience

The journey began positively, carpooling with my new friend Cilla. She shared her previous silent retreat experiences, and we didn’t stop talking for the entire five-hour drive to Denmark. It was a perfect way to release any lingering tension before entering silence.

Upon arrival, we were warmly greeted by Ava and Shanan at the A-frame cabin. Their welcoming energy, along with the forest surroundings and cozy fireplace, instantly made me feel at home. I had a deep sense that I was in the right place.

The following days were blissful. I spent my time doing the things I love most: being in nature, enjoying delicious food, resting by the fire, writing poetry, journaling, learning about philosophy, spirituality, and healing, practicing yoga and meditation, and of course, slowing down in silence. Honestly, the list of joys from this retreat could go on and on—it felt endless. Each time I attend a retreat, new pleasures and moments of joy emerge.

Of course, there were challenges too, which, in hindsight, enriched the experience and strengthened my resilience. Here are the most significant ones:

Challenges

Back pain: Sitting on the floor for extended periods and certain yoga postures triggered discomfort. This challenge allowed me to connect deeper with my body, listening to it when it was time to adjust, or switching to a chair for meditation, or modifying yoga poses.

The storm: A major storm hit during the retreat, disconnecting Denmark and Albany and leaving the venue without power for two days. I remember lying in bed the night of the storm, listening to the wind and the trees—it was both unsettling and awe-inspiring.

Shared showers: Staying in a shared dorm meant shared showers. The storm made things trickier, with cold showers and wet bath mats, but it became a lesson in patience and acceptance.

Digestion: Even though the food was amazing—nutritious and delicious—my digestive system struggled a bit. In subsequent silent retreats, I found that keeping hydrated and active helped. Meal times continue to be one of my favourite activities in every retreat I attend!

Insights and Realisations

As an avid spiritual seeker, I’ve explored many philosophies, meditations, breathing techniques, and yoga styles over the years. I’ve studied Tibetan Buddhism, attended Hikuri ceremonies, and experimented with plant medicines. But this retreat was different. It taught me that the greatest teacher is within. No external teacher, guide, or teaching can give you what you can offer yourself when you slow down, tune into your body and breath, relax into your heart, and connect with silence—our natural state of being. These are tools available to us at any moment.

One of the most profound memories I carry from this retreat is watching Ava tend to the fireplace each afternoon. Every time she stoked the fire, it felt like she was also tending to our inner fire. That flame has continued to burn brightly in the weeks, months, and years since the retreat, creating positive ripples in my life and relationships.

Ava is truly a wonderful teacher. She effortlessly guided us through talks, yoga sessions, and meditations, offering simple yet powerful tools to access the deeper layers of our being. Insights that had taken me years to reach were accessed in just hours and days. The stillness and vastness of the Self, coupled with the beauty of nature, made this an unforgettable experience.

If You’re Considering a Silent Retreat…

If you're looking to rest, heal, and explore the nature of your true essence, this experience is for you. Every silent retreat is different, and I highly recommend diving into the transformative power of silence.

Love,

Anaid